And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn’t for you crazy toddlers.

A TODDLER unmasked an international drug smuggling operation and smashed its hopes of earning a six-figure profit when he tore open a neighbour’s parcel and found a bottle of “sweets”.

The two-year-old was, in fact, holding diazepam pills straight from Sri Lanka – and now, thanks to Kian Parlour’s discovery, tablet-trafficking couple Patricia Chubb and Gareth Jones, of Court Place, Tonypandy, face six years in jail between them.

A toddler who fell in Lake Michigan last month has been taken off his respirator and appears to be improving.

Lazar Ognjenovic, 2, was admitted to Children’s Memorial Hospital on April 18, but he has now been transferred to the Rehabilitation Institute of Chicago.

The incident unfolded during a lakefront stroll with his grandfather when a strong wind blew the stroller into the water, officials said. A witness said the grandfather, who could barely swim, jumped in after the boy.

In a statement, the Ognjenovics requested that the public continue to honor their request for privacy “as Lazar enters the next steps toward rehabilitation.”

A “man” was sentenced to 30 years in prison for the murder of his infant son by striking him so hard he crashed into a fish stand and died.

William J. Duncan II, 25, asserted in court, “I am not a monster. … I think I’m good enough to take care of kids.”

Duncan, who pleaded guilty to aggravated manslaughter in March, admitted he was lying on the floor on May 23, 2006, with his son, William J. III on his chest when he pushed the child with “some force.”

“That angered and affronted me to hear (Duncan) describe himself as a good father,” Assistant Prosecutor Vincent Malfitano said after the court hearing. “This particular death is unexplainable. … It was completely pointless and senseless.”

“It’ll get stolen!” is the new “You’ll shoot your eye out!”

Research conducted by the Design Council showed that electronic gadgets such as MP3 players and mobile phones were common targets for thieves and muggers.

Nearly a third of 11-year-olds said they carried fashionable technological products worth over £200, with half putting the value of their gadgets at between £100 and £500.

The study said that one in three of the victims was actually using their mobile phone or MP3 player when it was stolen.

Texas officials have told the mothers of the children rescued from a polygamist sect that they need to abandon some of their religious teachings or they will lose custody of their kids.

Some lawyers believe this could mean women would never be able to return to the Yearning for Zion ranch in Eldorado, and would have to choose between some of their beliefs and their children.

But other experts said adults who have tolerated underage “marriages” of girls to older men and apparently have cast out teenage boys might have forfeited all rights to raise their children – and are lucky to be given a shot at regaining their youngsters.

In advance of court hearings that begin Monday, Child Protective Services has drafted 10 goals and 14 tasks that parents will have to work toward to regain custody of their children.

An Amber Alert has been issued for a 10-month-old boy who was allegedly kidnapped by his mother from a hospital in Orange, California.

Alakahi Thompson was taken from the hospital at 455 S. Main St. in Orange around 10 p.m. Wednesday, according to the Orange County Sheriff’s Department.

The suspect is identified as Ida Marybel Torres, a Latina who is 5 feet 4, 125 pounds, with brown hair and brown eyes.

Investigators say Torres also fled with her 5-year-old and 11-year-old children. It’s believed she is driving a rental car– a silver 2008 Chrysler Sebring, license plate 6AHA682, and may be headed for Kentucky.

The Sheriff’s Department said the boy’s father has legal custody of the child and Torres only has visitation rights.

A teenager in Florida alleging she was raped is airing her plight on YouTube, after she didn’t see justice done in the court system.

“Hi, my name is Crystal … I need some help. I didn’t want to do it this way, but it’s the only way I know that’s going to work, that someone out there in the world is gonna listen to me.”

The teen, whom CNN interviewed but is not identifying by her last name, is among dozens of young people who are turning to social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace to talk about sexual assault.

For an online generation, the Web offers what traditional counseling does not. It’s a chance to communicate without having to face someone or fear their judgment. Some people are seeking legal advice and medical information, and many younger victims believe they can warn others about their accused attacker, counselors say.

Well, in his defense, it *was* Foster’s, the “Amber Nectar”.

Constable Wayne Burnett said he was “shocked and appalled” when he pulled over the unregistered car Friday in the central Australian town of Alice Springs.

The 30-can beer case was strapped in between two adults sitting in the back seat of the car. The child was also in back, but on the car’s floor.

“The child was sitting in the lump in the center, unrestrained,” Burnett told reporters Tuesday.

“I haven’t ever seen something like this before,” he said. “This is the first time that the beer has taken priority over a child.”

He’s obviously never met our kids.

Belle Gunness, a notorious serial killer from Indiana at the turn of the 20th century, may have murdered children.

Investigators gingerly peeled back the brittle lining of the small caskets buried a century ago in a Forest Park cemetery, revealing the remains of three children—orange-stained ribs, leg bones, pieces of skull. They were jarringly mingled with hair and bits of charred tissue, hinting at the house fire that finally put authorities on the trail of a cunning serial killer.

“We couldn’t have asked for anything better than this,” said forensic anthropologist Stephen Nawrocki on the condition of the bones of a 5-year-old boy found in one of the metal caskets. “This is going to come out just beautifully.”

The exhumations were part of a broadening quest to shed light on the mystery of Belle Gunness, a wealthy widow accused of murdering as many as 30 men, women and children, often dismembering the bodies at her hilltop farm in LaPorte, Ind.

We don’t care if it was the most expensive makeup from Paris, toddlers routinely break stuff and it’s no reason to put the smackdown on them.

A Pasco woman who hit her 2-year-old son for getting into her makeup has been jailed for investigation of assault.

The 19-year-old appeared in court Monday and bail was set at $25,000 while prosecutors decide whether to charge her.

Police who were called Friday by the boy’s grandmother found scrapes and bruises on his face and bumps on his head.

An 11-year-old in Texas died suddenly from a disease that’s not generally known to be fatal.

Paul Roscoe, of North Richland Hills, Texas, died after collapsing at his home Saturday morning.

His death was triggered by Kawasaki disease — a condition that affects children, especially boys, under the age of 5, and causes aneurysms and blockages in the blood vessels.

Dr. Scott Alenick, a pediatric cardiologist in Northern and Central New Jersey, said Kawasaki disease is fairly common; however it is extremely rare for someone to die from it.

Our Thin Mints habit probably put her over the top. And apparently she’s a fan as well:

And now, with 17,323 boxes sold under her name, [15-year-old Dearborn girl Jennifer Sharpe] is believed to have sold more cookies in a single season than anyone in the U.S. ever has, according to Girl Scout officials who’ve planned a ceremony in her honor today.

Jennifer, a fan of the Thin Mints, used a retail-inspired strategy. She set up shop in a church parking lot from 3 to 7 p.m. Monday through Saturday. On Sundays, she sold cookies outside an auto parts store from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m.

“When I was young, I knocked on doors,” said Jennifer, in her 10th year of Scouting. “Now that I’m older, I get too many rejections face to face. People don’t want to buy from a 15-year-old.”

Some good news comes out of the horrific tragedy of the recent earthquake in China. A 3-year-old girl has been rescued alive from under a massive pile of rubble after being there for over 40 hours.

She apparently survived because she had been protected by the bodies of her parents who died in Monday’s disaster, the official Xinhua news agency reported.

The girl, Song Xinyi, suffered serious leg injuries but was able to talk when she was hauled out of the many layers of rubble this morning, 43 hours after the 7.9-magnitude quake struck south-west China’s Sichuan province.

“She explained the three Chinese characters that made up her name, and told everybody she loved painting and watching TV. Despite a coin-sized wound on her forehead, she still looked pretty,” Xinhua reported.

A version of Jessica’s Law in Utah may mean stiffer penalties for a man accused of raping a 12-year-old girl.

Don Dean Mander was charged Tuesday in 4th District Court with rape of a child and sexual abuse of a child, both first-degree felonies. According to a new law that became effective May 5, Mander could face a 25-year-to-life prison term if convicted of rape of a child. Sexual abuse of a child carries the potential for a prison term of six, 10 or 15 years to life.

A newborn baby was found dead inside a women’s restroom at the Excalibur Hotel in Las Vegas. Hopefully with the 10 gazillion cameras they have in that town police can find out who did this.

Roberts said that when police arrived at the Excalibur, they found a baby boy wrapped in a pillowcase with some towels around him inside an Excalibur gift bag on the restroom’s floor.

He said tests are being done to determine whether the baby was breathing when he was born, but the investigation is being treated as a homicide.

Roberts said the infant had an intact placenta with an umbilical cord.

Police have no suspects, he said.