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Now We Are Six: Why Older Children Rule |
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So it is with a dramatically unmixed sense of “Hurrah!” that I’ve observed increased independence from my now 6 year old twin girls. The early years can be long and I understand that the other later years can go by in a flash, but the joy and reprieve of having children who are potty trained, capable of making their own breakfast, and keeping themselves entertained (without TV, no less) is nothing less than a complete miracle. And not a moment too soon. I’ll never forget people stopping me and the twins along our (rare) stroller ride through town when the sweats and under-eye circles were like an “I Am Exhausted,” sign and they’d hurry to reassure me: “Don’t worry. It will get easier.” “When?? When??” I wanted to know. Of course the trick is that you never really know exactly when that easier portion will start (particularly when you have another child at 36), but I can now officially encourage all who are in the early phase of parenting. It Does Get Easier. Mark my words. The best rugrat reprieve occurs at the age of independent breakfast making. More than potty training even, the child who prepares her own breakfast can be encouraged to do so (on weekends!) so that parents can sleep in. Imagine! Only another year or so until I can read through the Sunday paper uninterrupted and complete a crossword puzzle or two over a hot cup of coffee. One of the best gifts of parenting is that it takes dramatically less to make a weekend morning feel fantastic. Sleeping until 9, hot coffee, newspaper. Any one of those and the day is made. Lowered expectations are a magical side-effect of raising children. I understand from those who have gone before, that older children come with their own fair share of baggage (the taxiing, the talking and listening, the dating, the money, the cars, the worrying) but for now I live happily in the netherworld of elementary school. All is still innocent and relatively safe. Parents are still (mostly) listened to and adored. No worries yet about fashion, or weight, or dating, or arguments about who gets to drive. The eye rolls do occur, but I’m not yet thoroughly disdained and am still greeted as the conquering hero at the end of each day. I’ll be 40 soon. And now they are 6. I’ll be getting the AARP magazine right as they get their drivers’ licenses. This reprieve will end before I know it. I will appreciate every soccer game free morning between now and forever. I will enjoy watching my daughters covered in grime not giving one thought to their urchin appearance or muddy shoes. I will stop and look down at their healthy bodies and imagine the day when I’ll have to stand on my toes to see into their eyes. Babies may be a gift from God, but older children are surely the best reward of a fickle and unreliable Universe… the only time off for good behavior ever granted a tired parent. | ||
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5 Responses to "Now We Are Six: Why Older Children Rule"Leave a comment: | ||
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1. Amber
Feb 21, 2008 20:15
With my youngest turning 5 next month, and my oldest on the cusp of tween-hood...I'm enjoying this reprieve to the hilt! Oh, the joys of sleeping in, how I missed you!2. Jenn @ Juggling Life
Feb 21, 2008 23:02
Even when it gets harder again, when they're teenagers, at least then you have the luxury of telling them they can roll their eyes at each other, and have cereal for dinner while Mom & Dad go out for sushi!3. AnaBanana
Feb 22, 2008 01:57
Beautiful article, and so true. My children are 19 and 18, and I've been through all the stages you're describing (and more.) Enjoy this stage; you'll need the strength for the next, but even those are hard in a very different way.Just one thing - I'd be *far* more concerned about you sagging in spirit than in body - just look at the pictures at "The Shape of a Mother" if you doubt me. Your spiritual condition is paramount - this has even recently been reported in the news. Those who are downhearted were sicker than those who accepted themselves as they were. Rest easy - you're doing a wonderful thing raising two children :)
4. seretamysweeta
Apr 27, 2008 18:41
Wonderful article and so true!!! I remember the breakfast-making on your own time and sleeping in until 9!!! It was a lovely time to cherish. Another wonderful time is when you see your child doing great things for her own children and family. A time to sit back, swim in the ocean and thank God for good mothers everywhere.5. nichole
May 21, 2008 23:09
I LOVE the makes their own breakfast age group.