blog comments powered by Disqus

Home -> Columnists -> Rugrat Reprieve

Rugrat Reprieve

It Takes a City and a State

By Rachael Brownell



We are grandparent rich in my house. What with the remarriages and divorces and remarriages and reconfigurations, we’re a regular people soup of a family. While I occasionally still feel guilty that I wasn’t able to keep everything all nuclear and white picket fence-ish for my daughters, I’m increasingly impressed and grateful for the many adults they have in their lives who love them well and feed them sugar and provide the best guilt-free babysitting available on the planet.

And really, the best rest a parent could ask for is the guilt-free kind. The time away when one recognizes that all parties are benefiting from the separation. Here are some of the activities my children enjoy solely because of the skills and patience of their grandmas:
  • Sewing
  • Making gingerbread houses
  • Reading Fancy Nancy one million times
  • Long discussions about trees, and birds, and flowers
  • Cooking
  • Decorating stockings
Without our posse of grandmas, my children would be little Martha Stewart heathen outcasts, just like me.



In addition to all the domestic skills and patience our collective pool of grandparents share, it brings the ratio of adults to children to the sweet spot where what we lack in energy what we can achieve in sheer numbers. When the under 4-footers outnumber you, you know it’s time to cash in the chips.

And the life-long relationship our children are building with people (much less cranky people) who are older, wiser, and more rested than Mom and Dad will ever be will add a dimension to their lives richer than food, clothing, and everyday parental adoration.

But what of all the children who are grandparent-less? What of those who, for whatever reason, are far away from grandparents? And while adopting a grandma or grandpa is difficult in a society as rigidly separated by age as ours, it seems the perfect solution to the ongoing problem of the rugrat reprieve.

Whether by birth or choice, there is no quicker way to reduce isolation and tension than fostering healthy relationships between one’s own children and other non-parent people…  Community, it turns out, is a hard commodity to do without. So how does one build a community these days? Aside from joining a quaint society like the Kiwanis or Lions, or a local church, community is elusive

What about you and yours? Do you have people to whom you entrust your children so that you can take a break? A beloved daycare provider? Babysitter?  Or, like me, have you been blessed by the riches of one million grandmas?


Rachael Brownell is the author of Mommy Doesn't Drink Here Anymore (Conari Press, 2009). A former contributor at Babble.com (which put Rugrat Reprieve on their Top 50 Mommy Bloggers list), she writes, edits, and raises children in the beautiful and blessedly cloudy Pacific NW. She spends time in between yoga classes shuttling kids and cleaning the kitchen. You can find out more about her and her Bikram journey at RachaelBrownell.com.

More Columnists:

Mominatrix
Moms and Dads can play dress up, too.
By Kristen Chase

The Parental is Political
Who's Who Among Presidential Candidates: Fred Thompson
By Julie Marsh

Home/Office
To Work or Not to Work, That Is the Question. Again.
By Dana Tuszke

The Parental is Political
Who is Sarah Palin?
By Julie Marsh

Mominatrix
Do dads like "Go the F*ck to Sleep" because they're sexually repressed?
By Kristen Chase

Related Articles:

Rugrat Reprieve
This one's for the boys.
By Rachael Brownell

Rugrat Reprieve
A Supposedly Slim Person I'll Never Be Again
By Rachael Brownell

Rugrat Reprieve
Spring is in Their Hair: The Joys of Making Them Play Outside
By Rachael Brownell

Rugrat Reprieve
F*ck Staycations! Bring on the real thing!
By Rachael Brownell

Rugrat Reprieve
The Ultimate Rugrat Reprieve
By Rachael Brownell

Google
The Imperfect Parent Web
Subscribe to our feed Follow us on TwitterFind us on Facebook
 

"Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it." -- Salvador Dali