If you peeked into the sexual minds of moms these days, you’d be surprised to see what they’ve been fantasizing about. Well, other than a month’s worth of free house cleaning and one full night of uninterrupted sleep of course.
The obvious answer might be some hot celebrity, like George Clooney.
But how about George Clooney doing it with Brad Pitt?
Yes, folks. Apparently gay erotica and porn are flying off the shelves and into the hands of women.
Now most people aren’t surprised when a straight guy talks about his penchant for girl-on-girl action. In fact, it’s completely mainstream, with overt references even being made on network television. Everyone knows that four boobs and two vaginas are way better than one, especially when they’re rubbing up against each other. And even straight women will admit to admiring a beautiful one if not her willingness to do one.
But two penises and a quartet of hairy balls doesn’t seem to have the same effect.
The strong religious overtones and the straight dude mentality (that’s a polite way of saying “male chauvinism”) that still governs most of the thinking in this nation can smother people with boobs but can’t seem to wrap their minds around two dudes going at it.
However, unless women are buying these books and movies for their closeted, repressed spouses, the sight of two hot, ripped guys poking each other where the sun doesn’t shine is actually pretty hot.
And really, if you take about two minutes to think about it, you can kind of understand why.
Regardless of how comfortable you are in your own skin, you inevitably compare yourself to other women — like the mom at the playgroup with a ridiculously tight ass, or the new mom with a three-week-old who looks like a runway model in yoga pants.
So when you’re watching porn, which for the most part is made for men by men, you’re going to be looking at a ridiculously hot chick and some dude who got the job because he was well endowed and could hold an erection for 45 minutes.
The guys in straight porn are clearly not picked for their handsome good looks. No guy wants to see some hot guy get a good looking girl. An ugly schmo like Ron Jeremy doing some hot sexy woman gives them hope. And it’s that hope that sells a shit-ton of videos.
But when you’re ogling two guys going at it, chances are they were picked for more than their big dicks. At least one (if not both) of those guys has to be the “ridiculously hot chick” except with a fine set of pecs and six pack abs, of course.
And when it comes down to it, there’s no skinny bitch loving the four hour long blow jobs and semen spray all over her face, who does nothing but make you look like a lazy, prudish fat cow.
But really, after all the labors, deliveries, and years of breastfeeding, it’s sort of nice watching a guy finally take one for the team.