I'm a Mominatrix

If you're wondering what it takes to be a Mominatrix, check out our "I'm a Mominatrix" interviews with some of the hottest moms on the internet who were willing to share the secret to their sex-cess. Apparently you don't need to be a leather wearing, whip carrying maven to be a Mominatrix, after all. These ladies have their own special ways of making sure their libidos know whose boss.

Featured Mominatrix: Heather Hitchcock

Heather Hitchcock, a 35-year-old blogger living near the coast in Alabama, spends the majority of her time parenting two NASA-reject monkeys. When she is not training them to perform amazing circus acts, such as picking up dirty socks and putting the toilet seat down, she works part-time for a spiritual center. Heather can be found at her personal blog, Queen of Shake Shake, and at the humor advice site, The Mouthy Housewives.

What makes you a "Mominatrix?"

Um, I looked that word up in the dictionary. Or tried. Did you know itís not even a real word? (Are you sure you used to teach college?) Can you pull out your special sex dictionary and tell me exactly what that means?

How do you feel about the term "MILF?"

Do you mean the midget porn movie MILF: Midgets In Love Forever? Yeah, I'm not really into midget porn, gross. How can you even ask?

How has "sexy" changed since you've become a mother?

As if horrid and extensive stretch marks, loose flaps of skin, and a hoochie that was stitched up crooked arenít inherently sexy. Whatever, Mominatrix. That shitís hot.

How has motherhood affected your sex life?

What is the question? I canít hear you. I just turned off the Wii and now my children are crying, loudly demanding pen and paper so they can report my crimes against humanity to the International War Tribunal. Iíve heard of this ďmake love, not warĒ concept, but clearly whoever said that doesnít know being Mother Superior of the Wii Gestapo is much more gratifying than making love.

What's a simple sexy tip (or tips) that you can share with other moms?

#1 Keep a well-stocked liquor cabinet
#2 Everyone looks sexy after a few drinks.
#3 Even people with horrid and extensive stretch marks

Your sexiest body part?

That would be the crookedly sewn hoochie, duh.

What accessory or piece of clothing makes you feel the sexiest?

Like I need a piece of clothing to feel sexy when I drive an 11-year-old minivan. Rawr.

Any special tricks (ahem)?

I consider the ability to control flatulence after childbirth a very special trick, indeed.


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Cecily Kellogg


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"Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can't accept your imperfections, that's their fault." -- Dr. David M. Burns