The Imperfect Community

[honeybee]

Is Jack still attached to MooMoo?

Has Molly adopted a lovey?

[DietCokeHead]

Yes and Yes!

Jack loves his Moo Moo still and sleeps with it under his face! Molly has an elephant that she loves too, originally named Ellie. It is a Ty brand thingy so I bought 3 hoping we would never run out! She rubs it on her face when she is tired.

We're lovey central here. What about you?

[Jessica]

Sorry to hijack this thread, but does anybody have memories of their mom getting rid of their lovey??

Holden still has his and I think it's gone on long enough. I'm thinking about throwing it in the garbage on his 7th birthday. Do you ladies think that's cruel? I don't want to emotionally scar him, but 7 yrs. old seems like I've given it long enough and I'm wondering if it could be holding him back. If Scott had his druthers, we would have done this years ago.

[prescott]

Will he be more scarred by taking it away, or him finding out you told everyone here he still sleeps with a blankie at 6?

[DietCokeHead]

Oh, I wouldnt throw it away!! How is it holding him back?

[honeybee]

Annie, I was asking because Ethan has had his lovey, Blanket, since he was 12 months-ish. Owen hasn't taken to anything and I'm wondering if he will. At this point I am doubting it. I don't know whether that's a good thing or not-- so many times we have been in a tizzy over not being able to find Blanket and I'm always worried it will be lost. But OTOH, it is really sweet to see Ethan care for and love something SO MUCH.

Jessica-- I don't have memories of my mom getting rid of my lovey. But she says when I was 2/3 she told me I was a big girl and it was time to throw blankie in the trash. She says I just walked over and tossed it in the trash can and never asked about it again. She did take the blankie out and put it away with some other baby things she kept for me.
When Ethan turned one my mom brought over that box of baby things to me. It is my old blankie that Ethan swiped for his own lovey.

I don't understand how having a lovey is holding Holden back?? I know some people keep thier loveys to adulthood, what's the big deal? If fact doesn't someone from here still have one? Unless it bothers Holden that he still has it, I would leave it alone. JMO.

[Rebecca_R]

I *still* have my blanket from childhood that my mom always covered me with. It's this fuzzy german blanket and it's soooo warm. The perfect blanket. And she never threw it away, which I'm so glad because I now use it on Nate and Aaron! And even someone like me who is just not sentimental finds sentiment in this big pink blanket!

Funny story, my grandma had this whacked out Freudian therapy during the 50's. And her therapist was mortified that she still had her pillow, which was her "lovey" I guess, and he made her throw it away. She tells this story as if it's this great that and her therapist finally made her normal (she ain't normal). But Juli and I were sitting there like "uh okay, you were still crazy now you just didn't have your favorite pillow and had to buy a new one."

[MainstreamMom]

DON'T DO IT JESS!!!!!!! I am still emotionally scarred about losing my lovey when I was little. It was a blanket that had been washed and worn so much that I only had one small piece left and I thought it would be a good idea to put it on the conveyor belt at the grocery store (remember those) and I would run outside and meet it just like the groceries. Imagine my HORROR when it got caught up in the machine and was lost forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My mother was so nonchalant about it and I am still not over it LOL! Let him keep the lovey! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze!

[Scout]

None of my kids has gotten attached to a lovie, even though we tried at times to encourage it. I never had a lovey either. I can tell you that I would MUCH rather have Joshua attached to a blankie than my freakin hair that he still likes to pull!

Jessica, that's a tough one. I can see where you're coming from, but at the same time throwing it away seems harsh. It would be good if you could get hime to make the decision. We have this cute book about a little girl and he blanket. It gets smaller and smaller until she loses the last tiny piece when she goes to school, and she's ok with it. I've heard a lot of people say that when the child loses the object themselves, they take it really well.

[Jessica]

Hmmm...well, you've all had good points. I'm inclined to agree with most of you, that I should just let it ride itself out or whatever. The reason I say, "Holding him back..." is because he's a little immature and I hope he's not using these things as cruches to sort of stagnate. He also sucks his thumb. I'm just wondering if it wouldn't give him a little confidence if he knew he could live without it, KWIM?

BTW, I had a pink "Ellie the Elephant" when I was his age and some jerky-butt kid next door took it from me and pee'd on it. (See problems did occur back then but nobody "diagnosed" it.) I still remember the heartbreak from that incident, so I can relate to the stories of lovey sadness.

[DietCokeHead]

I understand what you're thinking with the giving him confidence, etc. But if things are going ok for him now at home, school and with friends, I wouldn't mess with it. As long as he keeps it in his room or bed I would let him hold onto it. If you think about it, even a 6/7 year old is still a young child and many of them still need comfort objects like that. I was a thumb sucker too. It's such a hard habit to break! Start saving up for the braces, I guess, eh?

[colby]

I still have my blankie. It was loved to death, it kept getting smaller and smaller and now Ihave a piece of it sewed into another blanket, and I have that one still (It's in my attic, but I still have it). Never scarred me, and my mom never even really mentioned it until I was older about how she had had to sew it in to another blanket.

[JuneMama]

Jessica, I would maybe just limit his lovey to his room/bed. I can't imagine only sleeping with a lovey would be holding him back. Joey has a blankie that he calls his "nightie". It stays on the bed except if he's sick or really tired I let him bring it downstairs.

As for the thumb sucking. I sucked mine til I was at least 6 or 7. Only to sleep by that point. My mom tried everything to get me to stop, nothing worked. It just happened when I was ready. And I never needed braces.

[Jessica]

[JuneMama]

That is great he seems to be giving up the thumb sucking on his own!