It's a Girl: Women Writers on Raising Daughters
Edited by Andrea J. Buchanan
Seal Press, $14.95
248 pages, ISBN 1580051472

Review by Kim Schmidt

It’s a Girl brings together thirty mother-writers who each explore their experiences raising a daughter. This collection and its companion, It’s a Boy, were inspired by the (unsolicited) advice that editor Andrea Buchanan received during both her pregnancies. The comments started when she was pregnant with her daughter. "'Don’t worry,' they reassured me, 'you can try again,'" she remembers. When, a few years later, she was pregnant with her son she recalls, "Countless people told me how easy boys are; how loving, how sweet, how special, how different from girls—often, and appallingly, right in front of my three-year-old daughter."

Her answer to the neighbors and nurses who freely offered up their two cents is this compelling collection of essays that explores all sides of the complicated endeavor of parenting a daughter.

Parenting, motherhood in particular, has garnered a lot of ink lately. The "Mommy Wars" are, supposedly, waging fierce, but, thankfully there is a soothing antidote to the contentious, and arguably over-simplified, way the subject is covered in national newsmagazines.

Buchanan’s collection adds to the throng of bloggers, essayists, and magazines (think The Imperfect Parent!) who are tackling the topic of parenthood through thoughtful, literary pieces. This strong contingent of reflective writing about parenting doesn’t play into the media hot buttons, but instead recognizes the complexity of parenting, honoring both the confusion and the blessings that are born when a child enters the world.

The contributors to It's a Girl are largely well-educated, socially conscious, feminist (if not by name, surely by action) women who embrace having a daughter, recognizing the powerful and intense connection they share. They also realize, however, that having a daughter is a chance, good or bad, to watch an instant replay of their own youth. All of the emotional experiences that come with being a girl—issues surrounding body image, playground politics, even relationships with mothers—are ripe to play out again in their daughters. In one of the most moving pieces, freelance writer Kelly H. Johnson, finds herself so fearful of her daughter enduring the same playground teasing she did, that she unwittingly denies three-year-old Ellery an experience she freely gave to her four other children, all boys -- a trip to the playground. "On Ellery’s third birthday…her aunt casually asked her if she wanted to go to the playground. 'What’s a playground?' she replied."

Shortly thereafter, Johnson watches from the safety of the park bench as her daughter excitedly navigates the playground for the first time. "I, on the other hand, was unraveling. I felt weak and uneasy and desperate to leave."

The description of her daughter, wide-eyed and pure, running around the playground saying "Hi! I’m Ellery!" to each child she meets, is a moving description of how innocent childhood and girlhood, can be—and how difficult it can be for us to watch them, with their open hearts ready to receive the world, without filtering it first through our jaded lens.

Writer Martha Brockenbrough, a tomboy in her youth, is so sure she’s having a boy, that when she finds out it's a girl, she wonders "What would it mean that I was bringing a girl into this world? And how long before I could get her on a baseball team?" In what is a common thread through many of the essays, Brockenbrough’s daughter proudly wears her princess outfit despite her mother’s rejection of all things girl. Having internalized societal expectations of girlhood and boyhood, many of these mothers are reticent to have their daughters embrace play that they see as limiting: Barbies, princess outfits, makeup.

Over and over, however, the daughters have something to teach the mothers. They are the heroes of each of these stories—capturing the spirit of youth, so innocently and completely, they are best when they are being themselves. Whether in a princess dress or muddy boots or both, these daughters are strong, independent, unspoiled, pure, loving girls. Girls who have a thing or two to teach us.

Miss Mingo and the First Day of School
By Jamie Harper
Candlewick, $15.99
32 pages, ISBN 0763624101

Review by Amy Brozio-Andrews

In this warm and clever picture book by author/illustrator Jaime Harper (Me Too! and Don't Grown-Ups Ever Have Fun?), Miss Mingo, an outgoing flamingo, stands before her class on the first day of school, well-prepared to assist everyone in getting over those first day jitters with a little ice-breaking activity. However, when she encourages each animal to share something special about him or herself, she's met with absolute silence. So Miss Mingo decides to go first. Sharing the fact that the shrimp she eats keeps her looking a rosy shade of pink, she demonstrates her ability to eat upside down. Awed, Miss Mingo's students one by one begin announcing their own unique characteristics and abilities, from the alligator to the narwhal, the ant to the koala, and all the animals in between, until the pelican shows off his ability to carry an enormous amount of water in his pouch with unexpected and hilarious results.

Jamie Harper's conversational and informal style conveys a wealth of factual information about animals to young readers in a comfortable, easy manner while offering a reassuring story and pictures to kids who may be starting school soon. Complementing the story are short facts, offset from the primary text and in a smaller font, that elaborate on what each animal shares with the class. For example, where the octopus reveals the ability to taste with its suckers, the tiny factoid slipped between the arms tells of 2,000 suckers that can distinguish between sweet, salty, and bitter tastes. The non-obviousness of these tidbits is especially nice because they can be skipped over if necessary when reading to very young children while still providing parents with the information to answer kids' questions if asked, or included in the reading aloud of the text for slightly older readers, who are more likely to be able to incorporate the factual details with the story.

Whimsical watercolor and ink illustrations are paired beautifully with the light and humorous text. Playful interaction between the animals (i.e., as the narwhal demonstrates his sword-like tooth, the cockroach sits atop it with an unfolded paperclip saying, "En garde") as each shows off a special skill or characteristic adds visual depth to the story while keeping kids engaged.

Harper effectively captures children's personalities through her use of dialogue -- when the alligator tells her classmates about all the teeth she looses, displaying dental-studded jewelry, the koala wonders if she's ever heard of the tooth fairy, while the snake wonders if she couldn't be rich by now. Just like any class, there's friendly competition, tattling, sharing, shouting and laughing that goes on, brought to life through the realistic dialogue.

Miss Mingo and the First Day of School is a lively and empowering story that is a rare combination of entertainment and education for young readers that achieves success in engaging kids in both.