Author Archives: misty


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Posted on in Health | 0 comments

So, the saga of our severely fucked-up neighbor family continues. A couple of days ago, they knock on our door, grubby two-year-old in tow. The kids say he was scratched by our cat, and they’re taking him to the doctor for it. Yeah. It gets better. After they get home from their pediatrician’s office, they […]

Everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt.

Posted on in General | 0 comments

5:15 pm, Sunday June 22nd So.  Right now I am fairly inebriated, and in about two hours I must sober up to have the most difficult discussion with my child that I can imagine.  No, scratch that, I most certainly can imagine one more difficult, but we’ll get to that soon enough. Terse recitation of […]

Social conscience says WHAT?!

Posted on in Criminal Justice | 0 comments

I’m applying to be a CASA, G-d help me. For those not familiar with the term, CASA is an acronym for Court Appointed Special Advocate. The short version is, when a child has entered the SRS system for anything ranging from neglect to abuse to behavioral issues, the Court will appoint a CASA to independently […]

“Excuse me, but I think your son needs therapy…”

Posted on in General | 0 comments

Not exactly how you want to start out a conversation with your neighbors, is it? But I’m going to have to figure out some way to explain to them why I won’t allow my daughter to play with their five kids any more. Really, it’s just the one, the four-year-old boy. We’ll call him Damien, […]


Posted on in Family, General | 0 comments

I’m a coward, and a hypocrite, and all before 8 in the morning.  It’s gonna be a long day. I always swore I was going to be direct with my child about matters of nature and death.  I grew up hunting with my dad on one hand, and breeding cats with my mom on the […]

Leave Nancy, Marie, and Esther ALONE!

Posted on in News & Politics | 399 comments

I keep seeing sooo many blogs ridiculing that clip of the women from the LDS-breakoff compound in Texas. They’re robots, they’re brainwashed, they’re as interesting as oatmeal, they’re frumpy, they’re ugly, they’re dressed like Laura Ingalls, they sound coached . . . it just goes on. Many people are demonizing these women, but most are […]

Boobs, nuns, and savings plans

Posted on in Humor | 0 comments

These conversations always seem to happen when I’m elbow-deep in bread dough. “Jump, Mommy kangaroo, jump with me!” “Not now, Baby kangaroo.” “Jump with me!” “Mommy kangaroo hasn’t been that big into jumping since puberty, hon.” “Mommy kangaroo has big boobies. I’ve got little boobies. When I get really bigger, I’ll have big boobies and […]

Domestic Violence Theatre

Posted on in General | 0 comments

No matter how badly I was lost, I should have known I was on Troost, just by the car in front of me. ’94, ’95 maybe, Ford Festiva, patchy paint, shocks sagging comically on the driver’s side. Well, no wonder, the woman behind the wheel must have been at least four hundred pounds, if her […]

Transgressions In Parenting

Posted on in Humor | 0 comments

My munchkin has had an adventurous morning. After filling up a sketchpad with pictures of all the important people in her life (Auntie Lissa, Pizza Lady, Mommy, Daddy, MeeMaw, PaPa Boo, and Miss Nora, in that order—I’m happy to report that she works in accurate color representation; every picture has brown hair, except for “Mommy”, […]