Category Archives: House & Home

How to Kill a Spider like a Mom with Mad Skills

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© Can Stock Photo Inc. / lineartestpilot

My sons are constantly after me to remove spiders from their room. My preferred method is to use a glass to scoop the spider up and release him back into the cruel outdoor world of “kill or be killed”. However, until recently, I have not had an effective way to get spiders off of the ceiling. […]

Dear Family: Empty Toilet Paper Rolls Will No Longer Be Tolerated

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Flickr Commons / Photo vy GorillaSushi

Dear Family, Do not be alarmed if you are sitting on the toilet and have found this post-it note in place of the usual roll of toilet paper. The reason for this change of procedure is the result of great strides in my therapy. It is imperative for me to establish clear boundaries and set […]

Mowing the Lawn is a Woman’s Job

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StockPhoto/Dan Bradenburg

I have a confession to make…I love mowing the lawn. No, “mowing the lawn” is not some weird Mantra-type sexual position. I mean it literally — I love cutting the grass! We have a rather large piece of property with a nicely sized front yard and a backyard that is 300+ feet deep, as well […]

Red, Green and Yellowing

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Photo: Miroslaw Modzelewski When I was in sixth grade, my mom decided that we should recycle Christmas wrapping. Before you say what a great environmentalist she was, my mother recycled wrapping paper only because she didn’t want to buy any. I had to hand wash aluminum foil until it was a wrinkled, shredded ball that […]

‘Tis the Season

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Photo: Jozsef Hubay The children are so proud of themselves. We all stand around, enjoying this holiday moment. They have worked so hard, and are proud and pleased at what they have accomplished. We look on in awe; the lights are wrapped in a festive ring, not too tight, and blinking in rhythm. My husband […]

Mommy Slings Drinks

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Photo: Jim Jurica I am a mom who slings booze the color of apple juice, topping drinks off with multi-colored straws. I haul cases of Coors Lite on each hip in much the same manner that I carried my kids when they were toddlers. I wash the sippy cups of grown-ups and scold bold brawlers […]

Tales of Addiction

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Photo: Aleksey Lisovsky It started innocently enough. One half-cup of coffee on Sunday mornings, mixed with hot milk. A once-a-week treat, since I was still nursing. I had gone caffeine free while I tried to get pregnant (seven months), throughout the pregnancy, and for a good bit of time afterwards while I nursed my colicky […]

Going Domestic

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Photo: Johanna Goodyear "I’m working on spreadsheets; you just have to wash some pots." This from my husband, Ryan, after I asked him why he no longer did his share of the chores around the house. What set us off was my request, put ever so gently, to please wash the dishes from the dinner […]

What’s for Dinner?

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“Hey little guy, what’s for dinner?” My eight-year-old son is ensconced inside a fence of couch cushions on the living room floor. Miniature monsters are ascending the cotton-stuffed barriers and then skydiving into the fortress. My son calls a brief truce to address my question. “I don’t know. What have you got?” I walk into […]