Category Archives: Parenting

This Mother’s Day I Want to Break Up With My Son

Posted on in General Parenting | 1 comment

It’s Mother’s Day, and I want to break up with my son. At 21, Devin is mired in narcissism, bonded to his buddies like white on rice, and committed to the pursuit of sensory pleasure. I offer none of that. I’m his mother. And even though I know the days of hand-made cards and little-boy breakfasts in bed […]

I Started to Give Birth While on the Toilet

Posted on in Pregnancy | 5 comments

I was 7 months pregnant that April, according to my new OB/GYN who did not speak very good English. My husband had left very early for work, so I was home with our three kids, all ages 5 and under, and my brother-in-law who was there to paint for us. I woke up around 7 […]

What We DIDN’T Do This Summer

Posted on in Humor, Parenting Methods | 0 comments

The other day I was flipping through a parent magazine and got depressed. Apparently I was failing American summer motherhood. Reflecting on all of June, July and August, we hadn’t done anything of merit. My children were not enrolled in competitive sports or alternative cultural enrichment art programs involving bongos and kazoos. I did not […]

Grandmother’s Rant: Back in My Day, Kids Weren’t Coddled

Posted on in Controversy/Debate, Parenting Methods | 2 comments
Grandmother's Rant: Back in My Day, Kids Weren't Coddled

I see child-rearing from a perspective that none of these young parents have experienced. I grew up in the 1950s, supposedly a conservative era, but actually a much more liberal one when it came to freedom for kids. At that time we kids were pretty much on our own when school let out. The minute […]

First Grader Inquires Specifically about Bathroom Wall Language

Posted on in Child Behavior, Humor Essays | 0 comments
When my First Grader Inquires about Specific Bathroom Wall Language

  I’m not a prude about bad language. Not since third grade, anyway. But still I worry that if my kids learn about swearing, they’ll do it indiscriminately—pepper their conversations with “sh-ts” and “f*cks” and yell inappropriate phrases in the supermarket or at the park where littler kids (and their mothers) will hear. So I […]

Attachment Parenting Doubts: Am I Too Laid Back for AP?

Posted on in Controversy/Debate, Parenting Methods | 0 comments
Attachment Parenting Doubts: Am I Too Laid Back for AP?

Before my first child Hayley was born, I expected that she would immediately sleep in her crib and in her own room. I had visions of getting up every three or four hours, nursing her in the rocking chair in the moonlight, burping her, and laying my sweet little bundle back in her crib before […]

10 Ways to Adequately Embarrass and Humiliate Your Kids

Posted on in Humor Essays, Parenting Methods | 1 comment
10 Ways to Adequately and Effectively Embarrass Your Kids

It wasn’t enough that I had four children, they had to all be boys. Boys that peed in the neighbors’  yards and threw stuffed weasels at the new priest. Darling sons that “lost” their shorts during the Preschool Graduation and stopped strangers to tell about Grandma’s bra that “you could tie a knot in and throw […]

A Vacation by Myself, without Kids

Posted on in Family Travel | 0 comments

Over the summer, my husband decided that the trip to my family reunion, clear across the United States in Seattle, would best be taken by myself, without kids in tow, without husband in tow. I started off being less than enthusiastic about this suggestion. What if I just took our older son? I did this […]

Only Child: Why We Only Want One

Posted on in Family Size | 1 comment

I am the mother of one perfect daughter. She’s pretty, sweet, intelligent and a handful. My little girl just had her first birthday, and I can’t imagine a happier occasion — celebrating a year of being the mother to the most incredible being this world has known. Unfortunately, my joy in being a mom is […]

The ChildFREE (Hate) Movement: Childless By Choice

Posted on in Controversy/Debate, Family Size | 108 comments

Childfree. A clever appellation for a group of people who are “childless by choice”, the term conjures up happy associations with words like “carefree” or “worry free”. On the surface (that is, in the carefully chosen words on the front pages of their websites), this childfree movement appears calm and rational, even reticent, in the […]