Author Archives: Kelley Cunningham


Kelley Cunningham

Kelley Cunningham is a writer, award-winning artist, weekend poet, and an art director in children's publishing. Her work has been published in Brain,Child, Mamalicious, and The Funny Times. She has illustrated five books for children. A sampling of her amazing art talent can be seen at her website. Kelley lives in Pennsyltucky with her three wonderful sons.

Free association nation.

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“Mom, do we have our own gravitational pull?” “I don’t think so.” “Why not?” “We just don’t…” “I’ll ask Dad.” “Are you studying gravity in…” “Mom? Can I get the happy meal?” “No…last time you complained when you got the girl toy.” “But I won’t this time, Mom.” “Forget it.” “Mom, can I take my […]

Don’t Even Bother: The Case Against Childbirth Preparation Classes

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Do you feel that you were well prepared for childbirth? Were you able to distinguish the mucous plug from snot as you peered into the john for signs that labor was starting? Did you do your kegels while riding the subway to work, quite amazed that you could be doing something so intimate in such […]

“I Spy” for Parents

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(With sincere appreciation and apologies to the creators of the I Spy book series) I Spy: Laundry Hell I spy despair and guilt, toil and Tide. Too much laundry to even attempt to hide. Beach towels, even though now it’s Fall. Clothes stacked so long they’ve outgrown all. A squishy blue pillow that doesn’t belong, […]

“My Candle Burns at Both Ends” — Poems by the great poets’ parents.

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The Passionate Shepherd to His Son By Christopher Marlowe’s Dad Come drive with me and just be quiet, And we will live on a junk food diet That valleys, groves, road trips, and fields, Woods, or rest stop yields. And we will sit upon the rocks (If, under the seats, we can find your socks), […]

Need Guidance? Have Questions? Call 1-800-NUT-E-MOM!

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“Welcome to the Parent Help Line. Dial one for our automated menu options. Para el español, marcar por favor dos. Dial three at any time to speak to an operator. Dial four to speak to an operator who has children and knows what she’s talking about. Dial five for an operator who moonlights as a […]

Cheap thrills at the arcade.

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“Can we go, Mom? Pleeeeeeeze?” “Um, alright, I guess so.” “YAYYYY!!!” The arcade here in this small country town is a different animal from the neon-lit, eardrum-busting hells that dot the New Jersey highways, where I used to live. This one is just old and smells like despair. I don’t know which is worse. As […]

Hot rodent action.

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When I was a kid I came back from a vacation to discover that my Dad had given my dog away. This would normally be something that would cause irreparable harm to a young child’s psyche, but I didn’t shed a tear. I guess you could say I wasn’t an animal lover. Don’t get me […]

Just say no…freaking way is parenthood for me.

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I was fascinated by a recent conversation I had with a very lively fourteen-year-old girl about her "Family Living" class. That’s what they call "Sex Ed" (giggle) now. She told me about the new high-tech tool the schools are using to keep teens out of Abercrombie maternity smocks. Everyone in her class had to take […]

Hey, mom, what’s in your stars?

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Kelley is taking a well-deserved vacation, so please enjoy a previous piece of hers that originally appeared in Brain,Child magazine. Kelley will return next month. Today’s horoscope by Skye Stargazer, noted astrologer and mother of five. Aries (Mar 21-Apr 20): Resist the urge to form a posse to beat up the mother who brings in […]

Literature for Marginalized Mothers: 101

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The Pleasantville Adult School Catalog Sign up today! Classes now meet at the Middle School since that unfortunate plumbing incident at the VFW hall. Course Number 123: Continuing the “Literature for Marginalized Mothers” series, this semester we are offering “The Classic American Short Story”. Here is a quick synopsis of the stories we will be […]